The Painting

Last night, I told someone my life has breathed easier bcoz that person is living.

To you,
I'm sorry that i never get tired of telling you how much you inspire me. I'm sorry that I can't help always admiring what you do, what you say, bcoz you are absolutely a stunning star! I'm sorry that time and time again you blew me away. I'm sorry that you can't do anything about how I feel, and no matter what you think you'll always be that soul I'll always look back to have a glance and forward to look ahead of my time.
I'm sorry for hurting you.

I've never wanted so much in my life. But everytime I'd look at this person I kinda tell myself, is there a person whose life breathed easier bcoz I've lived? Being a blessing to someone's life everyday even when I'm living in my own truth? That's just too unimaginable! But this person makes it so damn easy! Okay, maybe you're having tough times too, but you're rising above it everytime! And that's just freakinly awesome!

Ages ago, you've invested in me everything that is loving, selfless, full of joy... Everything you've learned in life you gave/taught me generously and bravely. It might be too much to say that everything I am right now is all bcoz of you, but a large part of me, where love, self-love, giving, etc. Is really in reality all bcoz of you.

Someday, one day, I'd still want to be friends with you. I'd still want to see how you'd grow to be that feisty but soft person I used to know. I'd still think you're the greatest! I'd still think you're ageless! I'd still think in my life- there'll be no one absolutely like you! By thinking that alone-it makes me want to jump out on the couch.

"By the sea, with forest behind it for you in a place between our countries. And you can meet me there later in life. And you can take photos and I can paint." -- the most beautiful painting I've never laid my eyes on. But my heart has seen a thousand times!